A Quickie!

I am feeling much better!
I went to the doctor and got drained... literally, with a comically large needle... well, not the actual needle just the plunger part... it was gross... BUT I feel tons better and now I shouldn't ever have to see my stinky doc again. I wanted to write a big long thing about it... and still might at some point, but right now it is too negative of a thought... and now that it is over (we hope)...
I am moving right along. quickly.

I have mentioned my plummeting body image with this whole situation and I have started actively doing something about it.
I have a plan.
It involves paying very close attention to what I am putting in my body(at least until I break a few bad habits, like eating late at night)... I had stopped being as diligent over the past year or so.... and I no longer have that excuse. I didn't realize that I was using it... until the reason was gone. I also didn't realize how much I had given up on myself in this last period of time. The fact is that even the simplest things would hurt me... so I just stopped movin and groovin...
well, I'm ready to dance, again!

I am using an online source, SparkPeople, to track my food and be realistic about my caloric intakeand calories burned. It has a lot of good resources and message boards for support and so forth. I am still nursing, but he is 18 months old and it is not his only nutrition. I am in the process of don't ask/don't refuse.... meh... we'll see how it goes...
anyway... I want to get outside again and go to the park now that it is getting nice here finally. I maintained my weight throughout the last year, even lost some, but my body got so soft(and aged a lot!) from the lack of exercise. I was so much healthier last spring/summer because we went to the park everyday...and I wore Roscoe and ran around with Sophia.
I'm ready to go and play again.

Of course I'm not ready for that yet physically... but I will be soon. I am doing super light weights and slow and easy stretches. I know my body well enough to know when to stop. I forced info from my fabulous doc and now know that I can push the fluid back inside and not hurt myself...
{short story, I have a cap where the hernia used to go, it fills with fluid when I over do it... but if I relax I can get the fluid back in, like I used to with the actual hernia...as long as I'm gentle and calm. This cap will take anywhere from 6 weeks to 6 months to heal... depending.. but at least now I know what it is and how to deal with it!}

I know that some of you are also stay at home moms... how do you find time to exercise? I want to be able to walk at first, to warm my body up (it's been fairly dormant!)...and work up to walking with some actual speed... and the only alone time I get is at 1 and 2 in the morning... not exactly a good time for walking the ghetto! : )
Any suggestions are welcome.. although I can say now that a gym is not financially possible (not to mention when I would go...).. I just need some good ideas of how to carve out some time for myself. It sounds good ( and is necessary), but I'm not sure how I can actually pull it off.

ok, just wanted to pop in and say hi! I'm here... I have a few different posts partially done.. a few recipes, and a project for my other blog. I'll get them up soon, but my Dad is coming to town this weekend so it might be a week or so still. Thanks for coming around when I can get here! : )

Today I am thankful that I have somehow flipped my positive switch back on....and it seems fairly stable in the happy position... ya! : )

I am grateful that my Dad will be here this weekend. His visits can sometimes stress me out.. but more in a good way than bad! I wish he could come more often!